Sacred Wounds, A Religious Trauma Support Group for LGBTQ+ Individuals 

By Debbie Kahng AMFT

I grew up in a Christian household in the late 1980s and early 1990s. During that time, James Dobson’s Focus on the Family was highly influential and shaped many of the messages that reached my parents. Church was a central part of our lives. We attended on Sundays, Wednesday evenings, participated in vacation bible school during the summers, and I was involved in Pioneers Club, which was similar to Scouts but within a Christian framework.

I share this background because I knew from a young age that I was gay. By high school, I genuinely believed I was destined for hell. The shame was profound and deeply embedded. I reasoned that if I became more devoted, more faithful, more obedient, perhaps I could save my soul. I became president of the Christian club, attended a Christian university, and committed myself to prayer with the hope that I could “pray the gay away.”

Eventually, I had to confront a painful reality: there was nothing wrong with me. My attempts to change my sexual orientation were unsuccessful because sexual orientation is not something that needs to be fixed. I was still a good person. My heart was compassionate and sincere. The conflict I experienced was not the result of moral failure; it was the result of messages that framed my identity as sinful. 

What I experienced is commonly referred to as religious trauma—the psychological and emotional harm that can occur when religious teachings instill chronic shame, fear of punishment, or the belief that one’s authentic self is fundamentally flawed. 

For many LGBTQ+ individuals, this experience is not abstract. It is lived. It is embodied. And it can take years to untangle. 

Sacred Wounds is a weekly LGBTQ+ only support group for individuals who were impacted by religion—whether you grew up within a religious or spiritual system or experienced religion as a powerful presence in your family, caregivers, or home environment. For many, these influences shaped identity, self-worth, and belonging in painful, confusing, or harmful ways. 

This group is a safe and respectful space for people across the full spectrum of belief. You are welcome whether you still hold a sense of faith or spirituality, are questioning or redefining what spirituality means to you, or no longer identify with any faith, belief system, or religious organization. No belief, disbelief, or uncertainty will be privileged over another. 

The group is led by two facilitators who both identify as LGBTQ+, offering shared understanding of the complex intersections between faith, family, culture, and identity. You will be met with empathy, respect, and care—without judgment or pressure to believe, disbelieve, forgive, or heal on any timeline but your own. 

This group offers a compassionate, non-judgmental space to talk openly about: 

• Religious or spiritual messages absorbed directly or indirectly through family, community, or culture 

• How those messages impacted your identity, self-worth, relationships, or body 

• The grief, anger, confusion, or loss that can come with untangling faith, family, and self 

• Reclaiming your voice, values, and sense of wholeness—at your own pace

You do not need to have answers. 
You do not need to be “over it.” 
You just need a place where your experience makes sense.

Group Name: Sacred Wounds 

When: Weekly at 10:00 AM 
Where: Zoom 
Who: LGBTQ+ individuals only

Register: Debbie@thecentercv.org 

Come as you are. 
Your story belongs here.